Attitude Adjusters
I was having a bad day. I spent the last two days coming off the steroids they had me on over the weekend. I was exhausted, drained, and feeling all-around crummy! I couldn't seem to get enough sleep to produce enough energy to feel normal! To top it off, I had a bad morning at work, and I started to feel pretty agitated, pretty unappreciated, and pretty negative.
I was scheduled for a follow-up visit after my first round of chemo, and I made a plan to pick up Preston on the way to the office so he could join me for the appointment. Well, Preston stayed up all night (and I mean all night...as in when I got up for work at seven he was just going to bed) trying to catch up on the band stuff he wasn't able to fit in while taking care of me. And yet, he promised he would be ready to go by nine, and he said it was important to him to be at the appointment. So, I thought it was only fair to wait in the car while calling his cell over and over and over to see if he was ready as he promised he would be! (That and I needed him to bring my medications with him.) After the fifteenth call, I wallowed in a pool of anger, self-pity, and defeat, and I got out of my car to get the medication myself and see just how important I was to Preston!
I opened the door as loudly as any woman could possibly open a front door, stomped my way through the kitchen, like any mature adult would do, and to no avail, my sleeping beauty was out and oblivious to his fuming wife. By the time I got back in my car, I turned to God and just started complaining: "Why does life have to be so hard? I can't believe I even have to go to an oncologist today!? Why is all this happening to me!? Preston plainly communicated I wasn't important enough to him for him go to bed at a decent time!? Why am I so alone!?" You know, all the great questions that take us to the next level of faith!?!
During my little rant, I had the Wally Show playing on WAY-FM, and they were doing a segment based on a spin-off of the SNL skit about "First World Problems." They were joking about how people in first world countries complain about things people in third world countries would find offensive. Like, buying too many groceries and not being able to fit the milk in the fridge, or going to Starbucks and not having your $4 cup of Joe hot enough, or having to wait in line at the drive thru for lunch! The big quote from SNL was, "That must be so har fo you!" (It's pretty funny in the china man's accent!)
Then, it hit me! I have a good paying job that doesn't demand I work long hours doing work I loathe to do, but I actually enjoy my work and it allows for me to be able to do the other things I enjoy doing. I am driving in a car (that is paid off, fully-functioning, and dependable) to a doctor's appointment that is paid and covered with no out-of-pocket expenses. I don't have to walk, or take a bus, or even ask someone for a ride, AND I'm capable of driving myself! I get to see a doctor about my health, and though it may not be the best case scenario, I get to do that! In fact, I even have options about what kind of care I even want for treating the cancer. So many people in America don't have those same blessings, let alone people in third world countries! And here I was complaining about how bad I have it!
And Preston! I have a husband I know genuinely loves me, and I know he would go to the moon and back for me. I know how passionately Preston feels about his work, and I know what it is to work hard about something I'm passionate about. The fact that he put that aside for several days to take care of me communicates volumes in the first place. Yeah, I had to go to my appointment without him, but I certainly wasn't alone. Yeah, I didn't feel so great, and I wasn't able to do everything I wanted to do when I wanted to do it, but this is just a season in my life that would pass.
I definitely felt convicted! I was quick to repent of my bad attitude and started praising God for all the good things in my life, things many people had to do without, things many people were praying for and waiting to receive. I guess that's why God warns us in Philippians 2:14-15, "Do everything without complaining or arguing. Then you will be blameless and innocent. You will be God’s children without any faults among people who are crooked and corrupt. You will shine like stars among them in the world."
I was scheduled for a follow-up visit after my first round of chemo, and I made a plan to pick up Preston on the way to the office so he could join me for the appointment. Well, Preston stayed up all night (and I mean all night...as in when I got up for work at seven he was just going to bed) trying to catch up on the band stuff he wasn't able to fit in while taking care of me. And yet, he promised he would be ready to go by nine, and he said it was important to him to be at the appointment. So, I thought it was only fair to wait in the car while calling his cell over and over and over to see if he was ready as he promised he would be! (That and I needed him to bring my medications with him.) After the fifteenth call, I wallowed in a pool of anger, self-pity, and defeat, and I got out of my car to get the medication myself and see just how important I was to Preston!
I opened the door as loudly as any woman could possibly open a front door, stomped my way through the kitchen, like any mature adult would do, and to no avail, my sleeping beauty was out and oblivious to his fuming wife. By the time I got back in my car, I turned to God and just started complaining: "Why does life have to be so hard? I can't believe I even have to go to an oncologist today!? Why is all this happening to me!? Preston plainly communicated I wasn't important enough to him for him go to bed at a decent time!? Why am I so alone!?" You know, all the great questions that take us to the next level of faith!?!
During my little rant, I had the Wally Show playing on WAY-FM, and they were doing a segment based on a spin-off of the SNL skit about "First World Problems." They were joking about how people in first world countries complain about things people in third world countries would find offensive. Like, buying too many groceries and not being able to fit the milk in the fridge, or going to Starbucks and not having your $4 cup of Joe hot enough, or having to wait in line at the drive thru for lunch! The big quote from SNL was, "That must be so har fo you!" (It's pretty funny in the china man's accent!)
Then, it hit me! I have a good paying job that doesn't demand I work long hours doing work I loathe to do, but I actually enjoy my work and it allows for me to be able to do the other things I enjoy doing. I am driving in a car (that is paid off, fully-functioning, and dependable) to a doctor's appointment that is paid and covered with no out-of-pocket expenses. I don't have to walk, or take a bus, or even ask someone for a ride, AND I'm capable of driving myself! I get to see a doctor about my health, and though it may not be the best case scenario, I get to do that! In fact, I even have options about what kind of care I even want for treating the cancer. So many people in America don't have those same blessings, let alone people in third world countries! And here I was complaining about how bad I have it!
And Preston! I have a husband I know genuinely loves me, and I know he would go to the moon and back for me. I know how passionately Preston feels about his work, and I know what it is to work hard about something I'm passionate about. The fact that he put that aside for several days to take care of me communicates volumes in the first place. Yeah, I had to go to my appointment without him, but I certainly wasn't alone. Yeah, I didn't feel so great, and I wasn't able to do everything I wanted to do when I wanted to do it, but this is just a season in my life that would pass.
I definitely felt convicted! I was quick to repent of my bad attitude and started praising God for all the good things in my life, things many people had to do without, things many people were praying for and waiting to receive. I guess that's why God warns us in Philippians 2:14-15, "Do everything without complaining or arguing. Then you will be blameless and innocent. You will be God’s children without any faults among people who are crooked and corrupt. You will shine like stars among them in the world."
After my appointment, I brought Preston lunch in bed, and since he never heard the romping lunatic in the morning, he woke up surprised it was so late in the day and he missed the appointment! I'm glad I heard the segment on the radio and the day played out a lot differently than it could have. I ended up having a day full of thanks instead of a day full of the cranks! I needed that attitude adjustment, because no matter what your day brings, there is always something to be thankful for, even for a first world complainer like me!
God always knows what we need when we need it. Love you Bubba.
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